Dear Fat People…

My 15-year-old daughter asked me to come watch a video today! It was a video that a teenage boy from her school shared on his Facebook page. The video is of a “comedian” pretty much making fun of fat people for six straight minutes. The girl in this video calls it “comedy!” 
 
 
 
After watching the disturbing video, I sat and talked to my 15-year-old daughter who is currently 105 pounds and still thinks she is fat! She thinks she is not good enough and never will be. I don’t know why. I have always told her she is perfect and beautiful just the way she is, but sometimes it’s not enough! On top of the ridiculous standards of society saying that we have to be skinny, blonde and perfect, we have people like this horrible woman who actually chooses to spend her time on this planet spewing ignorance and hate!!! 
 
 
 
I try very hard to keep the communication open with my daughters, but there are some 15-year-old girls out there that have no one. Every single person in their life will tell them they are not thin enough or pretty enough or good enough just as they are. Some girl out there will be told she needs to lose weight if she wants to be pretty! And then we have this asshole come along and put out a video just reassuring them that they are in fact never going to be lovable or good enough.
 
 
Knowing that my 15-year-old daughter watched this, I wonder to myself how many other 15 year olds watched this. And I wonder if this “comedian” even knows, or cares about how many people who will watch her video, and her words will be the last thing they ever hear!! How many people will watch her video and go to the bathroom and throw up as much as they can, or stuff their face full of more diet pills. How many people will cry themselves to sleep, or feel even more unlovable and alone than they did before those words ever hit their ears!
 
 
I wonder if she feels bad at all. If she even cares! 
 
 
 
My guess… She thought to herself how can I get people to look at me? I want to be noticed and nobody is noticing so what can I do?? What can I do to become famous!! Oh I know… I’ll tear apart an entire group of humans that I don’t know anything about, and maybe someone will look at me!
 
 
 
And it worked!!! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!!!
 
 
 
 
Well… good for you Nicole Arbour, you got what you wanted. You needed  people to see you and give you attention. I do wonder though, if anyone overdoses on diet pills tonight, or jumps straight off a bridge because of your words, I wonder if it will even bother you!
 
 
The fact is we all would like to believe that some stupid words that an ignorant woman posts on a video wouldn’t have that much effect on anybody. But the truth is, there are many people in this world that do not have a solid self-esteem foundation where they were told their entire life how awesome they are. Some people have completely the opposite. Maybe they were told every day that they suck and will never be good at anything and it takes everything for them to just get up and face another day. How ignorant of this woman to think that her words are nothing more than comedy, and that no one could possibly be affected by them! 
 
 
 
If you want to see some people who will make you feel happy, make you feel loved, and make you feel like you are perfect just as you are. Check out some of these amazing people who are spreading love and acceptance on the internet instead of vitriol and hate just to get some likes.
 
 
 
Veronica Pooh Nash –  I recently came across Veronica Pooh Nash! This woman is so unbelievably amazing. I have never in all my life felt such genuine love come across a video as when I watch this beautiful woman. Every word she speaks comes from love. I would rather have my 15-year-old daughter watch any video from Veronica Pooh Nash and listen to her say “I love you and there is nothing you can do about it”, then ever have my daughter watch another thing that comes from someone filled with such ignorance and hate! 
 
 
 
Meghan Tonjes – Always making videos telling people to love themselves just as they are! A real ground-breaker in the body positive movement!
 
 
The Militant Baker – Another body positive role model. Everything she puts out is telling people to LOVE themselves and letting them know that they are okay and deserving of love exactly as they are!
 
 
Hannah Hart – I have watched Hannah Hart for years! I adore her! In every video she posts, they are filled with love and positivity. She has the most amazing happy presence, and you can feel the happiness through the screen!
 
 
Joshua Evans – He vlogs everyday, and at the end of every single video he posts, he signs off with “Be nice to people!”… What a great message to spread around… 
 
 
Colleen Ballinger – She also vlogs and is the creator of Miranda sings! I have watched her vlogs and she is one of the kindest people.
 
Jenna Marbles – If you haven’t heard about Jenna Marbles you might be living under a rock. She is hilarious and a true comedian. She has made videos for years and never once needed to call people ugly, or fat just to get someone to watch them.
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Laci Green – I LOVE Laci Green videos. I have my daughter watch them just because her message is so powerful and amazing for young girls. You have to check her out!
 
 
If you watch a video or read an article, and after you are done you feel terrible and really bad inside, then something is wrong! You wouldn’t surround yourself with people who make you feel terrible and awful. We call those kinds of people Draining soul suckers for a reason!! Nobody needs that in their life! Surround yourself with people who make you feel happy. Being happy and loving is contagious! And just remember.. you really are perfect just as you are! That is the TRUTH!!!!
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This video response to the Dear fat People video is the best one I have seen so far! Grace Helbig.. another amazing person spreading happiness wherever she can!
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What If… the world was Different?

What If??
 
 
Have you ever asked yourself what if the world was a different place? What if everything that you think and do now was completely turned upside down and backwards? How differently would you be treated by other people? How would you be treated by your family? How would you treat others?  I have asked myself this many times. I have wondered if the world was different, if people thought different thoughts than they do now, what would magazine articles look like, and what would movies and television shows portray?
 
 
If the world was different, how would YOU be treated differently than you are treated now?
 
 
What If… 
 
 
WHAT IF girls wanted to be Fat? They wanted it more than anything. Every magazine cover and every Top Model was FAT! Girls never went on diets, and only stepped on scales wishing and hoping that the number would go UP! Every single before and after picture was exactly reversed from every before and after picture you see in this world. Every magazine had an article that read “How to go from FIT to FAT! follow these easy steps!” How would you be viewed in a world like that? How would people judge you and treat you in the world that the epitome of beauty is fatness?
 
 
 
WHAT IF being Gay was normal? What if every family had two dads, or two moms and anyone with a mom and dad is considered weird. As a child growing up, you are told that being straight is a sin!! You have feelings for the opposite gender of you, but nobody understands this. You are a girl, and you fall in love with a boy and you get beat up for it, and thrown out of your family. ONLY boys for boys and girls for girls!! What kind of weirdo falls in love with the opposite gender?!  Every street you walk on you only see girls holding hands with girls, and boys kissing boys. You are afraid for anyone to know that you have fallen madly in love with someone who is the opposite gender. So you hide it. You have lived your entire life seeing only images of happy family’s; being two moms or two dads. NEVER one boy and one girl together. Your attraction and love for the opposite gender has made you feel wrong and shameful. Would you hide in a closet if the world was like that?
 
 
 
WHAT IF men breast-fed babies? The mother still carried the baby in her belly, and pushed it out of her Vagina, and immediately the father started producing milk from his nipples. Right after the baby was born, they hand it over to the father so he can feed the baby. The choice to bottle feed or breast feed is still optional, but they really push the daddies to nipple feed the babies. Nipple is best they say!! When you walked through the store, you see a father feeding his child with his nipples. He prefers to be shirtless because shirts are cumbersome while trying to feed the baby.  Would you still want him to cover? Would it be okay for him to walk around shirtless while feeding his baby?
 
 
 
 
WHAT IF most men were taught to be careful about what they wear. They were told from the time they were young that girls only think about one thing, and all they will ever want from you is sex!! A woman’s Vagina is thought of as her brain because her decisions are totally led by her Vagina!! Men had to be careful about being around a group of girls especially if they are drinking. Men had to worry about walking around alone at night because there could be a strange woman lurking around waiting to rape him. If the man got himself raped, he had to prove that it wasn’t his fault. Especially if he had been drinking at a party. I mean… he was wearing that very revealing tank top. Would you think he was asking for it?
 
 
 
WHAT IF looks meant nothing! Every person looked exactly the same. Every single person was an exact duplicate of each other. There are no different colors of hair or eyes or skin. There are no different cultures or different beliefs. There are 7 billion people on the same planet and ALL 7 billion people look exactly like each other. And every baby born looks exactly the same as every person already here.  It’s all the same. Just a big planet full of humans that are all exact duplicates of each other. No differences at all. Would people hate other people? Would there be racism or sexism? Would there be wars? 
 
 
 
WHAT IF the term “grow a Vagina” was the ultimate term for STRENGTH??!! When you said to someone “stop being a boy and GROW A VAGINA” it meant toughen up. Or “it’s time to ovary up, and BE STRONG!!” If someone was crying and showing weakness they were called a little dick with balls!! What if calling someone manly meant they were weak, and calling them girly meant they were tough! Would you want to be girly then??
 
 
 
Would the world be a better place for YOU if things were different? Would you see things differently and get offended differently than you do now? Would you have different beliefs, and different morals? Would you accept other people differently than you do in this world? Would you love differently than you do now?
 
 
 
In what world would there be no more hate?
 
 
 
What type of world would it take for everybody to love everybody? 
 
 
 
I wonder if this world could become a better world, empty of hatred and full of love… What if…
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I had to throw this in…
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I Believe In…

I Believe in Independence.
 
I Believe in eating vegetables.
 
I Believe in walking in the woods on a crisp fall day.
 
I Believe in coffee…with lots of sweet cream.
 
I Believe in eating chocolate (and peanut butter M & M’s.)
 
I Believe in not peddling my bike downhill after an excruciating uphill trek. 
 
I Believe in dolphins… How can you not (and puppies.)
 
I Believe in sunshine. 
 
I Believe in walking in the rain and feeling the drops from the sky. 
 
I Believe in laughing so hard I can’t catch my breath.
 
I Believe in standing at the edge of the ocean and feeling the waves crash at my feet.
 
I Believe in LOVE…so so much I believe in LOVE!
 
Loving the people in my life! My sexy, sweet man (I like my man the same way I like my coffee).. and my adorable sometimes cranky children. My sweet friends, and even acquaintances. I believe in LOVE probably more than I believe in anything. 
 
 
What I don’t Believe in is..
 
 
Telling other people how to live their life.
 
Telling another person what they should eat.
 
Telling another person what they should wear.
 
Telling another person how they should feel.
 
Telling another person how they should think.
 
Telling another person what they need to believe in.
 
Telling another person WHO TO LOVE or HOW TO LOVE!
 
 
It’s fairly simple really. More than anything I am against anyone who crosses over into another humans life and hurts them or alter’s their journey on this floating rock! Fundamentally we are all having a different experience on this Earth. Which makes all of our beliefs and thoughts different from each others.
 Your right as a fellow human being ends the moment where someone else’s rights begin.
Basically Don’t rape! Don’t murder! Don’t molest children! Keep your hands to yourself. This is the most basic law of Humanity!
 
 
 
Your beliefs are the sum of your experiences on YOUR journey. Which is why it makes it really impossible for ME to make any kind of judgement on someone else’s journey.
 
 
This is YOUR road!
 
 
This is YOUR journey!
 
 
 I prefer to keep my business where it belongs…on my own journey!
 
 
One thing…  we all know that at the end of the story, at the end of the road…LOVE will always win over hate. 
 
 
Love always Wins!  as it should be…
 
 
I Believe in Love! I Choose Love!
11

The day my son broke my Heart!~

Let me start this off by stating that what I am writing about is a very unpopular opinion. The truth is, we all have an opinion. This just happens to be mine. It does not make it right or wrong, it is just the way I see it. You can take it or leave it. My opinion will change nothing. 
 
Now a days, I see so many articles and Facebook posts about how kids today are whiny little bitches! I see it being said all the time. Many folks hate the idea of everyone getting a participation trophy when they play on a team because they feel that it is raising a bunch of pussies. I can tell you that when I was a child, and I was picked as the last kid a lot, it was painful. I took that in and it added greatly to my already lack of self esteem that I carried around on a daily basis. I was a child that came from a home where my parents didn’t build us up all the time and tell us we were awesome.  So every time I was reminded of this outside of my home, it just reassured me that I was in fact NOT AWESOME!! Growing up with that in your head on the daily, takes a long time to try and reverse those thoughts. 
 
 
 
So the other day my son came up to me and told me about something that broke my heart.  At his school they have this incentive program where kids that follow the rules and do as they are suppose to, they can gain golden tickets. They turn in their golden tickets at the end of the week, and every week they have a drawing and pick a winner from the bin. The more golden tickets you have , the better chance you have of winning. I think it is a great thing that they do for the kids. My son came up to me and we had this conversation about it:
 
 
The Boy – “You know how I have been trying to win the golden ticket thing since I was in kindergarten?”
 
 
Me – “Yes.”
 
 
The Boy – “Well… it has been three years and I have tried really hard to win. I think I just have really bad luck that follows me because in three years I have never won. Sometimes I will try extra hard to get tickets and put them in, but I never win no matter what I do. But I am completely okay with it. I am just not going to do it anymore. I have bad luck so I will probably never win it anyway.”
 
 
*At this point he could see I was feeling kind of bad about what he was saying and so he said this. 
 
 
The Boy – “Don’t be upset about it. I am completely okay with it. It’s not a big deal. I just have bad luck in my life and that is how it is.”
 
 
Now listen… as a mom, I have that mama bear quality when one of my children are hurt or upset where I want to make it all better. It is instinctively inside of me to want to fix things for them. I am not going to apologize for that!! When someone hurts my child, I become a crazy lady!! And yes, I wanted to go down to the school, and make them pick his name!!! But I also know that what he is experiencing is life. Just simply life! The thing that breaks my heart is I witnessed the very moment when my son lost that magical feeling of hope, and just became okay with it.  The moment of when he lost his belief in the fact that he can actually do anything. The truth is… life is not easy. And the truth is, not all of us can accomplish everything. We DO NOT always win everything, and truthfully, we will not always be able to do everything it is that we want to do. I am 42 years old and still waiting to take that dream trip to Paris! 
 
 
 
As a mom, I have always told my kids they can be anything and do anything. The world is their playground to do as they please. And even though I have always said that to my kids, I saw my 10 year old lose that hope simply because of his own experiences.
 
 
 
I will still tell my children that they can accomplish everything. And I will still tell my children they are wonderful! So many people disagree with this. They believe that you should never make your children feel special at all because the world will not see them as special or wonderful. I agree with that… except that the world and life will show my children well enough on it’s own that they are not special or wonderful. No one in this world will treat them like they are amazing. Life will knock them around the same way it does all of us. And they will have to learn to overcome obstacles all on their own. But like hell it is going to start with me!! I want to be the ONE place that they know is not going to fail them! I want to be the ONE place they can go and always know that I will see them as wonderful no matter what.
 
 
 
When I think back to my childhood, even if I had parents that had told me I was great all the time, I know for certain that everything I experienced in my life, from heartbreak, to not getting the job, to being the last picked, are all the things that showed me exactly how life is. The hard knocks of life! 
I just want my kids to know that even when life is knocking them around all over the place… the one soft place to rest for a bit will always be with me. I am not a perfect parent. I fully admit that I am in no way perfect at this parenting gig! The way I really feel is, I love my kids and I want them to succeed in all things. The reality is, they won’t succeed in all things. They will learn that totally and completely without the help of me. So yes, I will still tell my children that they are wonderful, and I will still tell them that they can accomplish anything. What they experience in this life will add to making them exactly what they become. I want them to always think fondly of their time with me though. I want them to never question the fact that I always have believed that they can be and do anything. 
 
 
 
Don’t twist my words. I say no to my kids all the time. That is because I am not in a situation where I can give them everything they want at all times. I am not talking about buying your kids a bunch of shit they don’t need. I am talking about building up their self esteem. I am talking about building them up as Human Beings. Reality is what it is! Nothing you say to your kids will change the reality of life. You can tell them they suck or tell them they are great, it will not change what life throws at them.  But it may change how they end up handling it.
 
 
 
 
All I know is that by telling my children that I think they are awesome, it is doing nothing but letting them know that I, their mom, think that they are awesome! It is not making them pussies that can’t handle life. It is just reassuring them that even if the world is shitty and hard sometimes, and things will not always be easy… no matter what, I will always think they are awesome! 
mf

Who are YOU?? And what do YOU stand for??

You know what, ..unless you have personally experienced racism, .you do not get to say it doesn’t exist! Unless you have personally experienced sexism, you do not get to say it doesn’t exist! Unless you have personally experienced being raped and bullied you do not get to say it didn’t happen!
 
 
 
 
It’s the same thing as if you tell someone that they are being an asshole and they say “No I’m not!” well it’s really not up to them is it?!
 
 
 
 
America was built on the backs of slaves! THEY built this country. This is a factual part of American history! We all learn about this in school. It happened!! These people fought for the right just to be seen as human. And now all these years later the residual effect of what this country practiced early on is still a very real part of our country today. So many voices are screaming and yelling to be heard! If an entire culture of people say that racism exists…than it does!! That’s it!!
 
 
 
 
You are not allowed to take anyone’s own personal experience away from them by spewing your uneducated opinion. And it is an uneducated opinion if you personally have not walked that road or experienced that experience for yourself. If someone tells you that they were bullied, who are you to say it didn’t happen or it wasn’t real?? 
 
 
 
 
Every single one of us are experiencing this life in a different way. The thing is, people get so wrapped up in their own heads and their own experiences that they forget everyone else is having their very own experience as well, which has NOTHING to do with you. 
 
 
 
It’s like everyone holds on to their beliefs with all their might! I like to call them “Believies!” We all have our believies and we go around telling everyone all about our believies and what we think and what is “real” to us. The thing is, none of your believies are real to anyone else but YOU!!! 
 
 
 
 
All of the believies that each of us have are no more than the sum of our experiences. That is the reason we all have such very different ideas about the way things are or should be. It’s all just a huge collection of thoughts that are directly stemmed from your experience on this planet.
 
 
 
 
The problem is when a person gets so wrapped up and stuck in their own head, they do not realize that outside of themselves are people with a different set of eyes and a different set of thoughts. 
 
 
 
 
Even folks that grow up in the very same house with the very same parents will have completely  different ideas about how things were. 
 
 
 
 
Right now is a hard time in our country. There is rioting and people screaming to be heard! They want to be heard! WE ALL Want to be heard. 
 
 
 
 
When people are screaming that injustice has occurred, who has the right to deny it?? 
 
 
 
 
If your child came to you and told you that someone made them feel uncomfortable and said really bad things to them, would you tell them they were wrong, or that it wasn’t true? Would you tell them it didn’t happen?
 
 
 
 
When do we stop denying and start listening to the voices that are screaming??  The voices that are hurting and crying for someone to hear them. If it was someone you love screaming and begging to be heard…would YOU listen??
 
 
 
 
My true believie above all else is that the only way TO PEACE is THROUGH PEACE!! …for all of us…
 
 
THIS HERE was written by one of my favorite people ever. She always seems to put into words exactly what is in my heart! 
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YOU are going to Die!!

You know what….let’s talk about death!! I know, I know, …it’s an extremely unpopular subject and doesn’t create happy inducing thoughts at all! But…. who cares!!

I was reading a Facebook post the other day from someone who decided to quit smoking because they didn’t want to die. Well… that’s awesome that you decided to quit smoking,  but I have bad news for you… you are still going to die! Here is the thing….. Everything that is alive on this floating rock.. will die. EVERYTHING!!! As a matter of fact, ..I decided to put together a list for you of all the people that are going to die.

If you run 5 miles a day… you will die!

If you never exercise even 2 minutes of your life… you will die!

If you eat kale for breakfast lunch and dinner every single day… you will die!

If you eat doritos for breakfast , lunch and dinner…. you will die!

If you are an athlete that won a gold medal in the Olympics… you will die!

If you are a couch potato that watches Netflix 10 hours a day… you will die!

If you are fat… you will die!

If you are thin… you will die!

If you are straight… you will die!

If you are gay… you will die!

If you are vegan… you will die!

If you are a meat eater… you will die!

If you dance the tango… you will die!

If you drive a mini van… you will die!

If you have a tattoo… you will die!

If you put lotion on every day… you will die!

If you have purple/green/pink hair… YOU WILL DIE!!!

 

My point is…. it does not matter what the hell you do, … everything with life has the same destiny.. and that is death! So stop using your judgments as a way of trying to get people to live the way YOU think they should live. Nothing you do will save you from death! NOTHING! It literally comes down to a matter of how and when you will die. NO ONE can predict that. You can be the healthiest vegan around and run marathons on a regular basis, and still not be able to predict your death.

 

People die everyday from random things.

 

When I was a kid, I used to fear death so much. I didn’t even like talking about it because anxiety would fill my chest and I almost couldn’t breathe. I realized after a while that it really wasn’t the idea of death itself that bothered me so much, ..but the thought of not being around the people I love anymore.

 

We are the ones that make death such a negative thing. None of us really know if the actual journey of death is negative. We just assume it is. Myself…. I fear more the way I will die. I mean, ..nobody wants to die from something as lame as laying in your bed watching a marathon of The Housewives of New Jersey and eating cheddar cheese bratwurst, ..and as you are shoving the bratwurst in your face, it gets lodged in your throat. Now you are choking on it and no one is around to give you the Heimlichs…so that’s it! Your journey on this planet is done because of cheddar cheese bratwurst! And now whoever finds you will see that you were eating bratwurst in your bed while wearing underwear at 3:00 O clock in the afternoon. let’s not forget that whole dying on the toilet thing that Elvis did. The guy spent his life being the epitome of a sex symbol just to be found face down on a toilet with his soiled ass in the air!

 

Everyone wants an epic death. If you had a chance to be a Hero, and save a bunch of babies and puppies from a burning building, ..wouldn’t you choose that? Or picture this…..There is an asteroid the size of Texas headed towards Earth, and we only have 18 days until impact. When it does hit the Earth, the planet itself and all of its inhabitants will be obliterated. YOU are the only one that can save earth!! It’s between you and the love of your daughters life to hit the final button that will blow up an atomic bomb inside of the asteroid that will ultimately STOP the asteroid from hitting earth! …Instead of letting the boy that your daughter is madly in love with die, YOU push him out of the way and take his place…. um, …I’m talking about a movie aren’t I? I knew this story sounded familiar!! Well….if you could die like Bruce Willis being all heroic and what not… wouldn’t you? …( Armageddon Shoutout)

 

I’m just saying I think even scarier than death itself is HOW it will occur, and when, because we just don’t know.

 

So my point is… Do what you want. Eat what you want,…Wear what you want….and quit worrying about what other people think of you! Because not only will you die anyway, …they are also going to die! And no amount of kale will tell you when it’s going to happen. It sneaks up on all of us.

 

Instead…. do what makes YOU happy! Do what brings YOU joy. Do what makes YOU feel amazing. Find what YOU love and do that! Stop listening to what someone else thinks you should be doing.

 

Unless you happen to be a Vampire, your time on this rock is as fleeting as anyone else’s. The truth is, ..I have no desire to live as long as possible, How many people like hanging out with the 100 and over crowd! No one is banging down their doors to party with.

 

So maybe Peter Pan has the right idea…. To die would be an Awfully Big Adventure!

 

BUT TO LIVE….TO LIVE WOULD BE AN AWFULLY BIG ADVENTURE!!…

So Live now my friends… Be Happy!

mf

 

 

I have a Dream… Maybe you do too??

I have a dream!! A very vivid dream…. of a world. A different world… A place that is much like the “Heaven” that many people think of. A place of acceptance. A place of happiness. A place of True Love.
I often have felt that this place… this “Heaven”… it could be here. It could be now. Life… it’s a gift. We are here for a reason. We have LIFE!! We have the ability to Love at the most extreme level. Why can’t this be heaven? Here and now! It’s really up to us. The people. The ones that have life. It is OUR choice!

So many people that have lived and also had a dream about a better world, many of them never lived long enough to see their dream come true. But it did! It has gotten better. It gets a little better every day.

I dream of a world where you can do the things that bring you such complete happiness and bliss, and never have to answer for it.
Which brings me to this:

Why does it bother you that the person sitting next you is fat? WHY? If your answer is that they are unhealthy… let me now ask you this. How do you know that? How can you tell? A person that snorts cocaine everyday is thin, … but they are unhealthy. A person that drinks soda and smokes cigarettes all day long everyday can be thin… but unhealthy,  a person that has cancer could possibly be thin… but unhealthy. Why then do you think you know the health of another human being just by the size of their frame? If there was ten people standing in a line up… and two of those ten people had cancer, ..but they all were different sizes, different shapes, different cultures, ….do you think you would know the two with cancer?? WHY do you think you have the ability to tell how healthy a person is just by looking at them?

Do you think you could tell who is GAY??…. Who does drugs?…. Who smokes cigarettes?… Who drinks green smoothies?… Who has 3 kids, …. Who likes to eat pizza, just by looking at them?? You would be exponentially wrong about your impressions!

Now back to why you actually believe you care about a complete strangers health. Do you?? REALLY?? You are going along with your day, and all of a sudden you see a complete stranger walking down the street. This stranger is a fat person, and all of a sudden YOU CARE about their health! So much that you need to make all kinds of assumptions about them as a person. They are Lazy, they eat Mcdonalds, they drink soda pop all day! How do you know that?? YOU DON”T!!!

When I was growing up…. the world was a much harder place to live in if you were gay. In the 70’s and 80’s people actually believed that if you were gay you would most likely end up with aids and were going to give it to everybody!! People used that as an excuse to be awful to gay folks. So many people hid away, and were so afraid to be open about who they really are. And live a life in which they are open to love whomever they choose. The world has become better. Yes, … homophobia still exists… but it has gotten better.

I often think about the people that have a dream of a better world and how they stood up trying to show others that by choosing Love… it will always be the right choice. People like Jesus, Buddha, Martin Luther King jr, Gandhi, Benjamin Franklin, Dali Lama, Rosa Parks, Mother Teresa, Nelson Mandela… just to name a few. And people of today standing up and changing the world. Oprah, Ellen, IO tillet wright, Misha collins (Founder of gishwhes), Jes The Militant Baker, and SO many more.
I remember clearly watching Ellen DeGeneres on her sitcom show back in the mid 90’s, and the day she decided to come out on the show. About a month later it was canceled. It was too much for people to see. But because she did that, because she made the choice to stand up for love… it opened the door. Now you can see an openly loving gay couple on TV and it’s okay. She helped to push that door open…

Some of you might say that being gay and being fat are different, that one is a personal choice and one isn’t… I don’t believe that, but more than anything, I am comparing those that have been hated or singled out. Those that are seen as “different” therefore not right. Biases have been present in all of human history, and that is what I am talking about. The biases that rule this world, and create hate where there should be love.

I am madly and deeply in love with The Militant Baker. This beautiful amazing woman is going to be one of the ground breakers in changing this world. Why?? Because her message is the same message that of all these other great people have been trying to give… it’s LOVE!!! So fucking simple right?? LOVE!!!

It’s almost funny because I am NOT a religious person. I have my own issues with religion. I do not practice any kind of religious anything. I do not go to church but I believe in Love. I believe love changes people. I believe love is the answer to everything wrong in this world. Letting people be exactly who they are… and loving them anyway. Not spewing what YOU think they need to be!

If a person wants to lose weight… then they should. Do it for yourself. AWESOME!!! If you would like to help other folks that want to do the same thing…. awesome! If you decide that other overweight people NOW need to lose weight because YOU decided to… NOT awesome! Just because it was right for you… and YOU did it, DOES NOT mean it is for EVERYBODY! Maybe THIN is NOT their bliss. Maybe they already love themselves JUST AS THEY ARE! WOW… what a concept.

As I was doing my morning routine and reading different articles and browsing the internet, .I came across an article about a woman who posted pictures of herself and got hateful comments because of her body size. She was shamed and ridiculed because people felt she was not the “right” body type for a certain outfit! She posted the pictures anyway and wrote an article about how she loves herself just as she is and she is still going to wear the clothing she loves. The very top comment said “I am SO SICK of seeing these articles about fat people loving themselves!” I have to tell you….that comment alone was almost enough to make me leave the internet forever! The fact that there is literally a person walking on this planet that feels this way…it’s almost scary! I re-call from history that Hitler preached things like… Be like me or die! If you are not the shining example of what I say is “perfect” than you don’t even deserve to exist! WHOA!! and the fact that there are still people walking around today that believe you have to look and be a certain way or you do not even deserve love! Scary!!

There are people that I love so desperately and dearly that are fat, gay, and have a different color of skin than mine! I love them so much, I love who they are…I love them so deeply…and yet the world is hateful to them. They don’t know them at all…only judge what they are looking at!! As a mom, I worry about my kids future. I more than any person in this world want them to succeed in all things. But I also realize that this world is tough place sometimes. I wonder if telling them they can be anything they want to be is really the truth!

I want my kids to not be afraid to be who they are. EXACTLY who they are. I made a decision. I will teach my kids about LOVE! I will teach them to love themselves fiercely and unapologetically in all things. On my quest to teach my children all about love and acceptance, I have trudged through such an enormous amount of hate! Articles and blogs, videos and comments upon comments of hate! 1st rule of the internet NEVER EVER read the comments!!!! Just don’t do it!! Such pure HATE! It really makes a person second guess why they are even trying. But I push through searching and learning for myself. Learning ways that I can teach my children to love and accept themselves, not change themselves. And then I found these amazing people in the world. That are pushing through with their message of LOVE! Acceptance!

So the thing is….. I really just want to know WHY?? If you are upset at someone, or hate them because of the shape or size of their body, or you hate someone because of their choice in who they spend their days with… or the color or shade of their skin or hair, or eyes…. or you hate someone because of the way they dress…. or what gender they are…. or what they choose to eat….. or if you hate someone for any reason really…. just any reason at all…. you need to ask yourself WHY?? Why do I HATE this person?

If you are SO SICK of seeing people find self love or self acceptance and this somehow makes you angry that instead of changing to be what YOU think they should be, …they actually decided to be themselves and be okay with it, and this makes you angry…. WHY?? Ask YOURSELF WHY??? And then maybe, just maybe instead of spending so much time trying to change the people you see in front of you, turn your eyes inward and look to change YOU! If you want to stop having to see fat people, or gay people, or any type of person that makes you angry…. then look inside of YOURSELF! Because once you do that…. what you see will be the one thing you can change. And that would be yourself! The only one that matters!

mf

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