There is so much controversy around the Fifty Shades of Grey series. Every where I look there are articles written about it, and people talking about it… so I thought… eh, why not join in the conversation. Chances are I’m going to piss some folks off, but that’s not a new thing for me… so here we go…
Let me start off by saying a few things. Yes, I read the books. No I do not live the BDSM lifestyle. Until now I had no idea what BDSM even stood for. I had to Google it. Even after reading the books, I didn’t know what that abbreviation meant. I’m not schooled in the ways of these types of things. I’m not saying I haven’t ever been tied up to a bedpost before…. wink wink…… but as far as a “red room” goes, nah, not something I have done. I have 4 kids so if I were to start doing things with whips and chains, chances are they would find them hiding in my closet and probably start playing pirates or something and end up beating the crap out of each other. I can see it now!!
While I was reading the books, I never once felt like I was reading award winning literature. I also read the Twilight series and also never felt like it was some awesome literature that was going to go down in history and change the lives of people everywhere. So when I see how angry folks get about these books, I can’t help but remember the scene in Footloose where they are all standing around burn barrels and throwing piles of books in the burning fire. Mob mentality at it’s finest!!
I have read Shakespeare, and I have read Harry Potter, and I have read Catcher in the Rye, …and I have read Pride and Prejudice, and I have even read much of the Bible. The thing is, …everything has it’s place. Every book is different and has it’s own place of where it belongs. All of the fighting that I have seen about these books I really don’t understand. I have seen comments where people say things like “These books promote abuse”, …and “this is not describing the lifestyle in the real way”. Well… first of all, the last time I checked, it was a fictional story about fictional characters. I never once read that the Fifty Shades of Grey books was a How To series… I mean, if a person is looking into actually starting up a lifestyle like that, I would think the best way to go about it is to research REAL forums, and books. Like maybe The Dummies Guide to BDSM. I don’t believe this fictional story was ever meant to be a real portrayal of how to be a BDSM type pf person. As far as the abuse thing, I mean really?? I am going to get a little personal here and tell you about my childhood. I grew up watching physical abuse happen around me. My dad and mom had a very volatile relationship and I saw things that a child should never have seen. I don’t want to get into it because that’s not what this is about. But when I see people saying this promotes abuse I just can’t help but laugh my ass off. I mean…. it’s NOT REAL!!! First of all… the most important part of any type of relationship is CONSENT!!! That is it!!! Consensual relationships. Where both people are on board and both people have made a decision to be okay with this. Watching my parents fight the way they did was horrible, and it taught me what I don’t want in a relationship. I have never been in an abusive relationship myself and the reason for that is, I chose not to. I made sure that I was not going to have that kind of violence around me. Now, if a person ends up with someone and they start to become violent, that’s when you have to make a choice. Do I stay or do I go? Many people stay. But isn’t that a choice? Which then makes it consensual. I know people are going to disagree with me on this. Fine, you have a right to how you feel about it. I am coming from the place of a child growing up watching 2 people tear each other apart and neither one of them walking away from it. It was almost like they were addicted to the craziness. Eventually it tore them down enough that they both walked away. It comes down to what you will allow in your life. This post isn’t about abuse. I don’t want to get into a big discussion about that. I think when someone is NOT consensual then it is abuse! When someone says NO I DO NOT WANT THIS, …and the person continues to do things, ..it is abuse! CONSENSUAL being the word here. My mom didn’t leave my dad for a long time. Every time she went back to him, she basically said, ..okay, I am consenting to the way things are. Eventually she stopped consenting and left.
Anyway… so now they have made this movie about Fifty Shades of Grey and people are coming out of the woodwork, freaking out about it. Holy crap folks… calm down! The thing is… it really is a fictional story. When I read it…. it was for fun. Nothing more. I thought many parts of it were silly and ridiculous, but I really wasn’t expecting for it to change me as a person. I went into it fully expecting silliness. It’s like the movies Requiem for a Dream or Trainspotting. Does anyone watch those movies with the idea that you are watching a manual on how to do drugs? Do you now, all of a sudden, have the urge to take heroin or cocaine? Or do you watch it, then continue with your life, how you lived it before the movie? Everything has it’s place in pop culture. It’s the same thing…. it’s just a story.
All stories are different and take you on a different journey. If this one was not for you, so be it. That’s why there is so many stories to choose from. The grey series started out as fan fiction, then became so popular that it morphed into it’s own story. If someone is choosing to use the Fifty Shades of Grey as a blueprint for their life, they may need to re-evaluate why they are doing that. But in truth, I don’t believe folks are reading this with the idea that it is all real life, and now they have to live this way. I can tell you that my experiences in my real life are what generally fuel my decisions that I make and it has nothing to do with some fictional story I read or show I watched.
So there it is. My very own opinion about the Fifty Shades of Grey series. Now remember, this is nothing more than my opinion. This is not real life. It’s just how I choose to see it. This will not change anyone’s life. It is just my thoughts. You can get mad if you want. But really, why waste the energy on getting mad about my opinion. Why not go find a book to read instead!
Here is a list of books you might want to include in your Book Burning of Fifty Shades of Grey!
1) The Bell Jar – The main character attempts suicide…
2) A Clockwork Orange – Rape scene by the main characters
3) Mildred Pierce – Has an incestuous love for her daughter
4) Wuthering Heights – Heathcliff is verbally abusive and katherine is manipulative and plotting things and together they make a pretty dysfunctional relationship.
5) Romeo and Juliet – 14 year olds killing themselves in the name of “Love” even though they barely know each other
6) Dorian Gray – He is a horrible awful person that is so shallow, and causes the death of a young girl that was in love with him and he sleeps around.
7) Jane Eyre – Mr. Rochester keeps his crazy wife locked in an attic
8) Battle Royale/Hunger games – Both very similar. A ton of teenagers being forced to kill each other for sport…fun times..
9) Game of Thrones – What ISN’T Wrong with this!! Murder, betrayal, incest, revenge, bestiality, cheating, and the best part is that a lot of the characters are around 14 years old.
This here is THE BEST dance scene in any movie EVER!!~ The funniest part about it is that all these people lived in a town where dancing was against the law, but once the music starts…all of a sudden everyone is a professional dancer! haha..