Times they are a Changin…and so are We!~

“Times change and so must I. We all change when you think about it. We’re all different people all through our lives. And that’s ok, that’s good, as long as you keep moving, as long as you remember all the people that you used to be.” -The Eleventh Doctor in ‘The Time of the Doctor’



I am just going to say exaclty what I need to say! Most of my life, I have spent NOT saying how I feel. Letting the ideas of other people sway me, even when I felt it wasn’t right for me. About 5 years ago, something happened in my life. I don’t even know how to describe it other than I just exploded. I literally could not take another moment of letting other people take advantage of me. I am going to go all Doctor Who here, and say it was like I was a statue, and something inside me just cracked and I busted out with all the force I had. This is it. This is who I am. I can not even think of going back to the person I used to be. Every so often I start to slip back, but then I realize… I DO NOT have to take anything from anybody ever!! No one does. Nobody should have to take shit from others just because they are family, or close friends, or whatever the reason may be.




The problem I keep getting tripped up in, is that I don’t want to hurt anybody. I just want to be a nice person. Well…. nice on the internet is a non existent thing. It’s very similar to being on the road in a car, and screaming at the idiot who cut you off that you wish he would die in a fiery pit of hell. I mean… technically that is a harsh wish to place on someone… but it’s a lot easier to scream that at someone when there is a car between the two of you. Same thing with the internet. There is this lovely screen that you have protecting you from actually seeing the pain or sadness you may have caused another person. So it’s easy!! I have been at this blogging gig for close to a year now, and if I have realized anything…. it’s that the internet is really a different world of it’s own. We all pretty much know that…. the world wide web has connected you to people that in real life you probably would have never met, or possibly even stood in the same room with because they are on the other side of the world. I think there is so much good in that. Of course with the good always comes the negative.



Recently I had some stuff go down, and came extremely close to walking away from this. I mean… it’s no big deal. I am not writing to save people’s lives here. I am not a talented writer of great literature. But there are some folks that enjoy what I put out there. It also brings me joy to make them laugh or make someone’s day. That is why I even do it. If my style of writing isn’t someone’s cup of tea… so be it. That is what makes this place so great. There are so many different kinds of people, and different ways of doing things that everyone can find something that they are into.


I believe with every fiber of my being that TRUE FREEDOM comes with acceptance. That’s it!! Acceptance. If you really, truly want to be free… then practice acceptance. Unless you stop trying to change others, and merely just accept them as they are…. then you will truly never be free yourself. You will be trapped. Not only is it exhausting to spend your time and thoughts on what other people are or are not doing…. but you are completely missing what YOU are putting into this universe. How can you put great, amazing things out into this world, when every thought, or action is basically trying to change other people to see things YOUR way?


My plan for this year is to keep on keeping on. I will let my integrity guide me on the right decisions to make. I will always choose love before choosing hate! I choose love, respect, acceptance, and kindness. If people try and take advantage of my kindness…. or enjoy seeing how far they can go with me…. then I will for certain tell them to FUCK OFF!!!! So… my motto for 2014…. love and kindness, and if you still want to be an asshole to me….. then FUCK the fuck off!! 🙂 Because I am not a door mat to be walked on. I have put together some of my MOST favorite sayings ever. Actually as I recently felt sucker punched by a “friend” … my daughter put these together for me to cheer me up. It’s the ones in your life that stand by you, and when your heart is broken, they are still there. When you are crying so many tears and you can’t seem to stop… they grab the tissues and sit right beside you. Those are the ones you want close to you. Those are the ones that will still be there even on a bad day.



My wish for all of you amazing beautiful folks is that 2014 is YOUR most amazing year yet! Do all the things that you have been putting off, or waiting to do. Just do them! Wake up tomorrow and do it. BE AMAZING my friends! You have the ability and power to be unbelievably awesome in all things….. So do it!! Don’t let anyone change who you are! Just BE the BEST YOU that is in you to be. You were created and designed to be AMAZING! SO BE AMAZING!!! ❤
Because I am a true nerd at heart…. most of these came from Doctor Who! 😉


~ “Life depends on change and renewal” -The Second Doctor


~ “Courage isn’t a matter of not being frightened, you know. It’s being afraid and doing what you have to do anyway.” -The Third Doctor


~ “You know the very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don’t alter their views to fit facts. They alter the facts to fit their views. Which can be uncomfortable….if YOU happen to be one of the facts that “needs” altering.” -The Fourth Doctor


~ ” Do you know in nine hundred years of time and space I’ve never met anyone who wasn’t important before.” -The Eleventh Doctor


~ “Your ideas are too narrow and crippled. I AM a citizen of the UNIVERSE!!” -The First Doctor


~ “I am and always will be the optimist. The hoper of far-flung hopes and the dreamer of improbable dreams.” -The Eleventh Doctor


~ “Letting it get to you. You know what that’s called? BEING ALIVE… Best thing there is…being alive right now is all that counts.” -The Eleventh Doctor


~ “You lot, you spend all your time thinking about dying, like you’re gonna get killed by eggs, or beef, or global warming or asteroids, but you never take time to imagine the impossible…..like maybe you survive.” -The Ninth Doctor

~ “Everybody knows that everybody dies…but not everyday, and not today! Some days are special, some days are so so blessed. some days…nobody dies at all.” -River Song



~ Everything will be okay! Everything will work out Fantastically if you walk your own unique path toward your dreams. You will be led to your own unique talent to the world! -Unknown



~ “BE BRAVE!” – The Eleventh Doctor


With stuff going on, I didn’t have it in me to make a video at this time. So Buster offered to do it for me. I was like….yeah…go ahead doggie….you make a video! So here is Buster’s Video…


16 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Le Clown
    Dec 30, 2013 @ 11:59:01

    I can’t let this one slip by… There isn’t much I add… But I will support you in your quest to continue to strive to be (see what I did there) your true self. There will always be opposition: ignore, move away, don’t give haters a moment of your time.

    And some other shit like that which you will find in fortune cookies.
    Le Clown


    • Vagina
      Dec 30, 2013 @ 17:19:10

      Thank you! I do appreciate your comment very much. It may have caused a few tears….but sometimes so do fortune cookies. When they are actually decent ones anyway…


  2. caffeinejitters
    Dec 30, 2013 @ 12:23:49

    Oh my gosh!!! I love all the Doctor Who quotes! Great blog, and great point made!


  3. Laura Lynn
    Dec 30, 2013 @ 23:28:35

    Buster’s MAD SKILLS are a thrill a minute. I can NOT believe he hasn’t been tapped to direct (or star in?) Fast & Furious 8. Oh….you’re nice too btw. ahem…
    Hater’s gonna hate. (so deep) . I simply can’t see you being a doormat. I met you here and you seem so…so…whats the word? Bitchy? No, but close. ( I don’t have to write that ‘LOL’ shit so you know I’m joking right? We’re past that, right?) I used to be like that too. I mean a doormat kinda gal. Then I’d explode at someone. Someday I’ll tell you the story of the poor bus driver…and that ex of mine. And the time I quit a job I hated. And…well, anyway, I decided to take my victories small and often rather than try and make everything right with the world. And guess what? I still have friends and family who love me. Best thing about the internet for me is meeting creative, funny, interesting, talented people like you. Happy New Year Vag! Can’t wait to see more Buster videos. And you too. Right…


    • Vagina
      Jan 01, 2014 @ 11:36:23

      Oh Laura Lynn…how do I love thee…let me count the ways!! ❤ I must tell you, I do love a big ol LOL after a sentence. I mean, usually you will see it in places like this: …So you actually PAID for that sweater..LOL….or….I really like your new haircut, I mean I can see your gray hair now…but it's nice…LOL!! I always think to myself…aw, how nice of them to let me know that they were really LOLing when they typed that. BTW…I'm LOLing right now, and YES…you and I are passed that part of this relationship!! You get me….you really do!! I AM BITCHY!!! You had it right. I have always been bitchy, I just never really let it out. I grew up Catholic!! There it is…I bet you understand it all now don't ya??.. I went to a catholic school and I remember very clearly watching a nun rip a tiny hoop earring out of a girl's ear because it went past the earlobe and that was a big no-no. There was blood, and it was a whole thing! You know…I was in 3rd grade so there ya go! You don't even have to be a psychiatrist to get where my issues come from. haha.. There was also that time that I was in 3rd grade and had to go pee, and the nun said no! She just flat out wouldn't let me go, so I held it as long as I could…but you know…eventually pee happens. So I peed at my desk in front of the entire class because I couldn't hold it anymore…and I think the nun actually smiled!!! It made her happy!!! Anyway…I have always been this bitchy fuck off person, just really been held down ya know. A lot of fear and that kind of crap.

      So apparently I am writing you an entire novel about my crazy past!! You make me want to tell you things Laura!!!! 🙂 The BESt part about the internet is meeting people like you! I am SO glad I met you. You make laugh, I LOVE your stories, and I swear you really do get me. Sometimes I come across people that are just like…What the FUCK is wrong with you!!!! They don't get me ya know! 😉 But it's the folks like you that have made this whole thing so so worth it. And why I want to keep on keeping on. I have asked myself….why? Why are you even putting yourself out there? YOU are the reason!! I would have never met you….and some of the other great people that I have met if I hadn't.

      Laura my hope for you is that THIS will be your BEST year yet!! Grab it by the balls and don't let go!! 😉 Thanks so much for always coming by and making me feel better. I love ya!! ❤ ❤ ❤


  4. Laura Lynn
    Jan 01, 2014 @ 21:59:59

    SEE! It’s the f-ing NUNS!!! They tried that shit on with me too! I got hit over the hands becasue they asked me to count to one hundred and I already knew how to count to one hundred when I was 3. So I skipped the 70’s (no doubt because somehow in 1966 I knew that I was going to live them over and over again in my mind. Oh how I miss the 70’s when I was a young and hot teenager and roller skates and awesome music were my driving force and the Beatles were still together -sort of-and all the world was my oyster – before I found out oysters didn’t agree with me. The 70’s, when STD’s didn’t kill you and you could have sex with everyone you wanted to and do cocaine and qualudes and stay up all night and STILL look great in the morning, the 70’s before I realized that men lied and my hair wasn’t always going to be Farrah Fawcett amazing…ah the 70’s! When Led Zeppelin were still together and The Bee Gees and Abba were making music and I thought Elton John was hot because I didn’t understand about homosexuality! When Black Sabbath still had Ozzie in the band and not Ronnie James Dio who was good I’m not saying he wasn’t but HE didn’t sing on ‘Paranoid’ nuff said Oh the 70’s) and she hit me on the hand. Bitch. I told Mom. Boy was that nun in trouble then! Because, as my mom put it, ‘No one hits my kids but ME!’.
    I wish you’d said you walked up and peed in her coffee cup but that’s just a fantasy.
    F-ing nuns. Sometimes. I’m sure there are plenty of nice ones out there. Somewhere. Besides, being bitchy is a badge of honor. If it makes me more like Hilary Clinton, if thats the watermark standard of being a bitch, then I have a long way to go. I want to be THAT kind of bitch.
    So you just keep on keepin’ on. That’s the kind of thing we’d say in the 70’s. Right on, girl. snnnnniiiifffffffffffffffffffffffffff…..aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.


    • Vagina
      Jan 03, 2014 @ 12:18:02

      Laura…It’s always the Nuns!!! I think everything wrong with the world is their fault!!! It’s true!! I should do a video about that! 😉 The 70’d were awesome. I also had farah faucet hair! I was really good at the feather. Then the 80’s hit and let me tell ya…my hair was soo big I could get radio channels straight from Tokyo. I used a can and a half A DAY to get my wings. When I was on the bus to school, my wings needed 2 seats. No one could sit next to me because they would get stuck in my hair. Then I met my husband when I was 14, and at the time he had the mullet and between the two of us…we were a BIG BALL of hair!!! I wish I knew how to post pictures here because I have a great one to show you. Dangitt…I’m an idiot though and can’t figure out how to post it in the comments. I will keep trying…I must show you the hair…..


  5. apleasanthouse
    Jan 08, 2014 @ 13:10:19

    Vagina- have you been reading my mind you talented gal? Love this post. Batman should have knocked Robin around more. Sorry I haven’t been around lately- shizz going on here as well. I’ll keep the faith if you will.


    • Vagina
      Jan 08, 2014 @ 19:30:29

      I am so glad to see you apleasanthouse! I have missed you. I completely understand though….It was weird because I can’t say that the whole of 2013 was bad….but right at the end there….it got rough!! I will keep the Faith!!! ❤


  6. Lisa
    Jan 10, 2014 @ 14:00:58

    VAGINA!!!! Did you think I was dead? Well, I almost was!!! I was so sick with a sinus infection and my doc gave me penicillin, and it turns out I am highly allergic to penicillin and I had a horrible rash all over my body and a fever, etc!!! Is that crazy or what? But I’m back now and I’m here to tell you that I LOVE that you busted your way out of the pushover Heather statue and became the great and wise and hilarious Vagina!!!! I had a similar past life, and I’m still working on the full-on bust-out, but I get closer all the time. I am REALLY glad you haven’t walked away from this blog. You sometimes say that you’re not a great literary talent or anything, but I have to tell you: you are. You really touch people with your writing, and you are truly hilarious and genuine. To me that is better than freaking Moby Dick or some shit. You don’t see me running to the bookshelf to read chapter after chapter of Pride and Prejudice, but you DO see me running people over to get to the computer to read post and post of your blog!!!! My daughter always says, “Mom, are you writing to Heather, again?!?!?!?” HAHAHA you’ve become a household name in this household! Also this is completely random, well not really since this is a vagina themed blog, but my spunky niece (age 10) told me that she wants a new name for “vagina” and she came up with “pocca-shya”, Pronounced: “Pock-a-shy-a” , because she says it’s like a pocketbook, and you’re a little shy about it. 🙂 Now everyone in this house has been actively using the word “pocca-shya” for vagina 🙂 So sorry I’ve been gone from the loop for a while, but I’m back, baby!!! I missed you a lot! I hope you had a great Christmas!!! I love you Heather!!!!


    • Vagina
      Jan 10, 2014 @ 14:33:26

      hahahaha….OH MY GOSH!!! I was sooo sad! I thought you left me forever, and I kept looking for you. I have actually been over to your blog many times, and I wanted to comment but for some reason, I have trouble being able to comment there. WordPress makes it difficult to get on other blogs and leave your mark. I have the same problem when I am trying to comment on The Dumbass News blog. I can’t like anything and they make you jump through hoops to leave a comment. haha….

      You always leave me the BEST compliments. You make my whole friggin week!! AND you made me piss myself about the Moby Dick!! Has anyone REALLY ever truly read Moby Dick??…Probably some smart dude somewhere.

      You know what’s weird….I am highly allergic to a penicillin called “sulpha.” They gave it to me once, and I had the same reaction you are talking about. I blew up like a cherry tomato and my whole body was itchy and red. It was AWFUL!! So on top of having to be given a NEW antibiotic, you also have to re-cover from the allergic reaction. OH HONEY….I know how you feel. If I lived closer I would have brought you some chicken soup that was made entirely out of Vodka!! I sure hope you are on the mend now.

      My new Favorite word of 2014- Poccashya!!! It’s perfect. I can’t believe your niece is only 10. That is BRILLIANT!!!


  7. Lisa
    Jan 10, 2014 @ 18:33:24

    HA! Don’t worry about me, Heather, you’re stuck with me for life!!! I was so sick and I was like, Vagina’s going to worry if I don’t get back online soon!!! 🙂 And something cool happened to me: There’s this magazine called Bookmarks, it’s all book reviews and stuff about books, and there’s this regular section in the front where readers can send in their lists of favorite books and do a little write up on them, and if they publish yours you get a free subscription, and they published mine this month! If you go to a Barnes and Noble, find the magazines and take a look 🙂 They didn’t even tell me they were going to publish it, I just opened my new magazine last night and there it was 🙂 It was a very cool moment in the little life of Lisa 🙂 Oh, and I’m not sick anymore but feel free to FedEx that soup my way!!!!


    • Vagina
      Jan 11, 2014 @ 11:29:21

      LISA….That is soooo awesome!!! I am definitely going to check it out. Nothing that cool has EVER happened to me. I am definitely going to make a trip to Barnes and Nobles just for the Magazine. that is so cool. I think it’s awesome that you accidentally found out. That kind of makes it even more fun. Just opening it up and BOOM there you are. Very cool!!!

      I am so glad you are feeling better!! And you definitely do not need to be sick for that soup! That soup works pretty much ANYTIME!! 😉


      • Lisa Eggers
        Jan 12, 2014 @ 20:03:17

        I would be so honored if my favorite writer read my little list!!!! Thank you, Heather! You are the best!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks for being excited with me 🙂 xoxoxo

  8. Lisa
    Jan 13, 2014 @ 10:37:50

    Amen Sister! You are amaze-tastic. Sorry to hear you’ve had a shit-storm visit you in the form of a “friend.” Your choice to keep on keeping on is what makes you so awesome. Love what you had to say and I’m inspired to practice acceptance, put love and kindness out into the world, and let the persistent assholes go fuck themselves. You. Are. The. Best.


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