Okay…I got this idea from watching a video from the Indie chicks. This is a link to their website and you should definitely check them out. You can click HERE! They are bad ass in every sense of the word, and I love this website. They made a hilarious video about search terms, and I got the idea that I could probably write an entire post about the crazy that is typed into search engines that brings people straight to my blog. I can not even believe some of this stuff. There have been days where I am almost baffled that a person typed this in. I should have known right off the git-go that putting Vagina in my title was asking for trouble. But I never in my wildest….okay…maybe my “wildest” but surely not my normal….okay, I don’t have “normal dreams”…but what I am trying to say here is….. let’s just get on with it, and you will see what I am trying to say. I’ll start with some of the more ” normal” terms that have been typed into search engines that bring you directly to my blog. And then we can approach some of the weirder ones. I will leave the real nasties for the end because there is nothing like leaving you with some images in your head that you can never un-see again! ( There are some I completely left out because I don’t even want to re-type that kind of crazy!) here we go..
1. Good junk food/junk food/ Junk food confessions ~ Not too weird right. No big deal….someone typed in Junk food and came up with my blog. I wrote a post about Junk food confessions so there ya go.
2. Reason for cleaning toilet and surroundings, cleaning toilets/toilet water splash back. ~ Yeah…I get it..
okay…these are super boring, so I am going in for the real crazy shit! I am typing them EXACTLY as they were typed into the search engine. Misspelled words and all. Just know that none of this comes from me personally! I am crazy….but I even have a limit. Italics is my thoughts on the whole situation.
3. ooopsi i saw my sisters nice ass ~ First of all why are you looking at your sister’s ass, and more importantly…why are you thinking it is nice?
4. wife pussy peanut butter and dog ~ There is a whole lot going on here at one time….multitasking at it’s best I guess.
5. spray painted vagina ~ might be fun…
6. which whole is a dogs vagina ~ ummm
7. road side peeing my butt froze to the car story ~ I would like to read that story!
8. deadliest vagina ~ Not to be confused with Deadliest catch…or it could be, I mean…crabs are crabs right?..
9. i became a whore for my husband ~ anddddd???? We all have our whore moments don’t we…
10. dick and cunt ~ go together like peanut butter and jelly, or peas and carrots, or cereal and milk, or penis and pussy…..
10. what do i say when my husband calls me a cunt repeatedly ~ FUCK OFF!!!
11. girl letting a chiweenie lick her pussy ~ look away now….seriously….look the fuck away….
12. dwarfism vaginal opening ~ wrong website folks…your looking for Web MD! ( or wikipedia, you can probably find some pictures there.)
13. you are a douche ~ yes…I can be…( I wrote a whole post about how not to be one HERE .)
14. i+love+my+mom’s+vagina ~ Than you may need something stronger than google to give you an answer…
15. going to pee my pants” “peed” ~ I understand!
16. can’t stop a husband from fucking whores means what ~ means you GOTS TO GO because he’s a fuckface!
17. my spouse is a souse ~ what does that mean? Seriously…I don’t know what that means…
18. sopping wet wife time ~ then why are you on google?…Go get it..
19. mum promist to be my slut stories ~ O.O what ISN’T wrong with this is the question…
20. and last but certainly not least – fun cunt ~ Why yes…I am! Thanks for noticing…
21. I lied! There is one more – is it true that peanut butter and jelly sandwiches feel like a vagina ~ ummmmm, possibly, although I’ve heard cherry pie holds a close second…
There you have some of the weirdest crap people have typed into search engines that brought them directly to me! As long as I can give back to the community that is all that matters! Just remember, be careful what you type into Google because that shit will haunt you forever. Happy internet searching folks!! ~