Peek A Boo


What can I say about neighbors. You either like them…or you don’t! Some people are really lucky and can buy ranches or lots of acres and don’t even have to really have neighbors. But even the ones that don’t have neighbors, probably did at one point in their life. We all know how it goes…some are good, and some are not. Some keep to themselves, and some really just don’t!! Through the years, I have had some doozies. The first apt. that the husband and I had together was pretty much a dive. It was bad! It was a triplex thing above a whole bunch of garages. Which now when I think back was actually a really bad idea considering we were probably inhaling everyone’s car fumes. Now I know why I kept dreaming about crazy ass turkeys chasing me. I swear that dream haunted me through the 90’s. Friggin crazy turkeys hunting me down! Anyway..I will never forget those neighbors. I remember the day she came over and was like…”um, hey…so we have no power, so I was wondering if we could use a cord and plug into your apt?”  OKay! I guess so. Well, 8 months later the big orange cord that ran from their apt. to ours was still plugged in, but it had been there so long it was becoming part of the cement. That was just our first introduction into neighbor land. Since then we have lived in apartments, and duplexes and had many different experiences along the way. Met some people that are still friends and still in our lives, and ones that I am happy to say are not! :/ You all know what I’m talking about right?? The guy across the street that you have seen his butt crack WAY, WAY too many times to count, or the lovely lady next door that continually let’s her pooch crap in your yard, because she thinks you like it!! So this leads me into our most recent story. ( names and address withheld for security purposes) *wink wink…anyway, so this neighbor has this thing that she likes to do. Basically she sits out at night and maybe has a cigarette or something, to be honest I am not exactly sure what she is doing, but the idea is that she sits outside in the dark, sort of crouched down where no one can see her. She does this crap ALL THE TIME!! Like you never know when she is there. It seriously sucks because usually if you know people are around you can at least be discreet about things. If you need to adjust your “whatever” then you can take a quick look around and make sure no one is looking and do your thing…but not with “crouching tiger” in the neighborhood. That is what we call her. “crouching tiger” because you have no idea when she is there and what she possibly just witnessed until it is too late. I don’t want anyone to get the wrong idea here…she is very nice, and I don’t have any issue with her personally. It’s just that I always seem to forget that she could possibly be lurking about and I do shit thinking no one is watching. Then I look over and eye contact happens and I’m like “CRAP!” She saw me. We have sort of an on-going joke about it…It goes something like this..(.Yell at your kids – I’ll be there!) ( Cuss at the dog – I’ll be there) ( slip on the ice – I’ll be there) (adjust your unders – I’ll be there)! The list goes on…There is no escape from lingering eye balls! I would love to hear some crazy neighbor stories from all of you. Bring on the worst…



2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. sean gray
    Mar 13, 2013 @ 02:25:13

    I understand the pain.


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